Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Stuck

Thanks once again for the support and suggestions. I really value your opinions and input. I should explain a couple of things. I am paying for everything out of pocket. I am in Canada so we don't pay for ultra sounds but I pay for the drugs and IVF with no coverage (we exceeded the coverage I get at work for drugs already). The frustating thing is that the government is about to start covering IVF in my province but it will probably take 2 years before it is effective. I have considered moving to another province where it is free of charge but that is just a pipe dream. I should also explain that we are stuck in our clinic for now. The way it works it that you pay the full fee up front and if you don't go to retrieval they keep the balance (minus the drugs) to use it towards the next cycle (very sneaky!!). We seriously considered switching clinics after our last cycle. But we figured it wasn't the clinics fault I didn't get pregnant and wanted to avoid going through all of the preliminary tests again so we decided to stay. Obviously that wasn't the best decision we could have made. Plus there is a 3 month waiting list to get into other clinics in my area and I have added my name already just in case.
So I did call the clinic and demand to talk to my doctor. However, he wasn't in (he is head of the local hospital) and he won't be in the clinic until next week. He doesn't have email and he doesn't take phone calls (wow, how special!). I will be seeing a doctor tomorrow but not mine. The first appointment I can make with my own doctor is March 31 (a lot of good that will do with this cycle).
I guess the decision is really mine and G's to make. I have always known the problem would be with my eggs. So do I convert to an IUI (although the stats are so low) and keep the money for a donor cycle? Or do I give it one last shot with my own eggs?(3 seems to pathetic to me) Another thought I had was to have my sister and I stim at the same time and then throwing all the embies we can make in there. Imagine after all this I end up the octomom part 2 (I am just kidding, I think I am loosing my mind). I guess it would be impossible to have us both stim at the same time (and super expensive) but it was a dream. That way if we took the 2 best embies between the both of us I could fool myself into thinking I was the egg donor.

7 comments:

  1. This has all got to be so hard. I am really pulling for you dear!
    Whatever you choose, we are here.
    It sounds like you are not very confident about this cycle for IVF though. Are the two-three eggs you have of good size? Maybe they are all you will need!
    I think going through with an egg donor will be more pricey...maybe you should save your money for that?
    Good luck sweet girl - with everything.
    MissConception

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  2. Dear KC,

    I know how hard this journey is as I am also experiencing it. Stay strong and hang in there. I am praying that 2 is all you need and that this cycle results in a BFP.

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  3. I'm so sorry about this frustrating cycle. I don't have any great advise, it's such a hard decision. But I hope it becomes clear to both of you. ((hugs))

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  4. Take a deep breath.. one step at a time. First, I would just think about what to do about this cycle. Once you figure this out, then decide what to do next. Take a snapshot of the situation, rather than seeing a big picture-- you will get overwhelmed if you are planning too many stuff.

    Just plan for tomorrow. You are going to meet the doctor so plan to discuss with him about THIS cycle-- what to do now? Should you continue with IVF or switch to IUI? If you continue, figure out the dose of Gonal-F. Also, would he consider using Ganirelix so you don't have premature ovulation?

    You will be okay.. just be prepared for the appointment tomorrow.

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  5. Hey KC...I sent you an email.

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  6. Very much hoping you got some good guidance today from the doctor. I know this all seems like an impossible situation. So very frustrating. I wish you peace with whatever decision you make. Hang in there. You do have options and I know you'll get there one way or the other.

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  7. Just stopping by to say hi. I'm guessing your appt Wed (I think) didn't go to hot since you haven't posted since Tuesday. I'm sorry this sucks so ridiculously badly. Hoping you at least got a bit of guidance about the other options out there.

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