Sunday, November 28, 2010

The saga continues

I am learning that I don't have a backbone. I am so easily swayed it isn't even funny. I went into my drs appt today thinking I was putting my foot down and cancelling the cycle and now we are still in limbo. Dr. G says he wants to take one last look tomorrow and then decide if we should give up on the IVF cycle and opt for an IUI. I have a lot of feelings about this and they are running through my head like crazy. I think I might actually know what it feels like to be mentally ill (I am not poking fun I am serious) and to have uncontrolable thoughts jumping into my brain.
So here is the updated follicle situation. At our clinic they expect to only retrieve eggs from follicles that measure at least 2.0 (again I don't know the unit of measure). Generally the follicles grow .2 per day and we have until Tuesday for them to grow. As it stands I have three that look good to go (1.9, 1.8, 1.7), three that are on the verge (1.4, 1.5, 1.6) and two that are a long shot (both 1.2). So I guess if the three that are on the verge grow there .2 or more then my doctor is going to suggest that we continue on to do the retrieval. Otherwise he will suggest an IUI. I am not that stoked about an IUI, because the reason we are doing IVF is because we aren't good candidates for IUI. The stats for women over 35 with Stage IV endometriosis doing IUIs are ridiculously low! I feel like they just do IUIs when IVF is cancelled to keep their patients busy and feeling like there is some hope left.
So those are our options. Try to retrieve between 3-6 eggs or convert to IUI and be more aggressive with the stim drugs next cycle. By the way my sister is insisting that she wants to give me her eggs and she is very serious. I have told her the ugly truth about the process and she says she doesn't care she wants to do it. Her husband has offered to take off time from work the days she has drs appointments and they have already dicussed the details. Hubby and I feel so loved and so much better to think that we have a back up plan. I know that she has offered before but I thought seeing me go through the tears and endless appointments that she would be turned off. She says one month out of her life no matter how uncomfortable it is is worth my lifetime of a happy family. She also mentioned that I could give her a lung or kidney. Then we joked about selling her eggs on the black market to finance her renovation on her house. I have the best family in the world even though they drive me crazy most of the time.


  1. What an amazing offer from your sister! That is incredible that she would be so willing to donate her eggs. You are so lucky to have such a supportive sister.

    I'm sorry you are still in limbo on this cycle. I'm easily swayed on things too, but if you don't feel comfortable moving forward on this cycle, maybe it's for the best. It would be so nice to see the future and then make your decision...
    Good luck!!! Keep us updated!

  2. I think it is good that they are letting you go a few more days, hey you are already on the meds so why not??!! As for the IUI, my logic is the same. If you have already taken the meds then why not, even if the chances are low 5% is better than 0% right?
    That is so kind of your sister. I hope you both and sift through your feelings a bit and decide if that is the way to go. With that said, I would not give up hope yet. While I am clearly not an RE, I have varying results from different IVF cycles (# eggs retreived, # embryos, embryo quality, # transferred). They did a few different things for me to get us better results and I switched RE's between ivf 1 and 2.
    I am always here for you, feel free to email me if you have any questions (my email is on my blog site).
    Thinking of you...

  3. Wow, what a wonderful sister. I would imagine that a back up plan must feel nice!
    Well, I hope those little follices grow! Fingers crossed for you . . . one more day!

  4. I hope the extra few days allows those other follies to catch up! Otherwise definitely go for the IUI - it's better than nothing! And what a wonderful offer from your sister. You really do have an amazing family.

  5. I want to give you a little bit of hope, we only retrieved 5 eggs, 4 initially fertilized, and 1 arrested after the first day and we ended up 3 embryos and we are now pregnant.

    Hang on to hope, I know this is a tough road, but keep hope!!!

  6. I know it must be hard to know you are not in a perfect situation, but you still have hope with those 3-6 follies. Give them time and then make your decision. Try not to fret before you have to.
    It's so nice what your sister offered. Sounds like you have a very generous family.

  7. IF = mental illness, hands down.

    Can I say how much I love your sister? And I haven't even had "first sight!" I'm totally tearing up over here. And I think it's an excellent trade for a lung or kidney....done and DONE. ;-)

  8. I'm so sorry about the roller coaster you are on right now. No one can tell you the right answer. I wish I could. To give you some hope they never retrieved more than 6 from my ovaries, and I ended up with two to transfer and one to freeze both times. Its the quality of the ones they do get that counts the most. I hope and pray there are clear answers for you tomorrow!

  9. Just catching up.... I was totally devastated to read your latest updates. I agree with the others...don't give up just yet. Obviously you need to contemplate your decisions, but trying to guess what those follicles will do is just so hard. I know you have probably driven yourself crazy with every "what if" scenario.

    Yeah - so your family - AMAZING. Can they adopt me?? Your parents offering to help with the finances and the amazing offer from your sis. That is just incredible. I'm so glad you are surrounded by love that you so deserve.

    Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Hugs!

  10. The odds of a pregnancy via IUI versus natural only goes up 5% if there are no egg/sperm issues... which sounds like that's not the issue.

    My clinic considers anything above 1.6 as mature. The measurements are in cm... so it's 16mm.

    Getting 3-5 mature eggs is a great outcome and if you only transfer 2 you'll have two FERTILIZED embryos in your uterus instead of just hoping something goes well with an IUI.

    Join - amazing insight and advice on the site. Big hugs and Good Luck!!

  11. Been thinking about you, hope today went well!