Bladder Infection...Yeast Infection....Oh my

So I am in fact infected. I have a bladder infection and what seems to be a yeast infection. It is painful and I am not sure why I am not on antibiotics. I went to a walk in clinic and the doctor scared the shit out of me. He said that it can impact my pregnancy but then just told me to follow up this weekend. Instead I have made a follow up appointment at my family doctor. I want to be treated especially if it can impact my pregnancy. Yep, here I am freaking out again. Why can't anything be easy!!!

Stinging and Burning

My uterus and cervix have this new continual stinging and burning sensation. It feels like a bladder infection and it is freaking me out. I am trying not to google it but it is a really weird sensation. I would guess it was some sort of STD or Urinary tract infection but the stinging isn't as localized. It is a really weird feeling and it makes me worried that I am going to miscarry. What the heck is going on? Should I go to the hospital?

Is this morning sickness?

I feel like absolute poop! I can't drag my butt out of bed, I am dizzy and I feel extremely run down. I literally can't function. I went to a beautiful wedding last night and all I could do was sit and watch the festivities. I barely danced and I didn't get to socialize like I usually do. It will be all worth it if it is for the health of my babies (please let that be why I feel this way) but I am still worried it means something is going wrong. Especially because I had a tiny bit of blood yesterday. Seriously I mean a tiny bit (like you have to strain your eyes to see it). It happened twice over the past 24 hours but non the less it makes me nervous. I am not doing the normal Dr. Google thing I am just taking it easy and keeping my legs crossed. My ultimate fear is that it will turn into a full fledged bleed and I will have to admit myself to the psychiatric area of our local hospital.
Sorry that I haven't commented on blogs lately, I am literally too tired. I am thinking of everyone and I appreciate all of the kind posts. I will catch up on everyone very soon!!

Looking Good!

So we had our ultra sound today and it was completely nerve wracking. I was literally shaking so hard on the table that the ultra sound tech had to hold my legs still. I was full of nervous energy and it was uncontrollable. It was literally the hottest day of the year today (it broke record highs) and I was shivering with my teeth chattering. The good news is that we were able to see two gestational sacs. I was super excited and some of the nerves went away. The nurse was also able to point out a yolk sac in Baby A but wasn't able to note Baby B's yet. She said she thought she saw it beginning to form but it wasn't clear enough to be sure. I am over the moon and hoping and praying that both embabies stay where they are and continue growing and thriving. They are both measuring at 5 weeks and I love them already. Please, please, please let this really be happening. Now I have to wait 2 more weeks (yes, another 2ww) for my 7 week ultra sound where we will (please god) see the heart beats! I want this so badly I can't think straight. I am literally not functioning, all I do is think, eat, and sleep baby thoughts.

To tell or not to tell

So, I am, as usual, struggling with this wait. I really can't complain because we are going for our ultrasound way sooner than anticipated but the wait is painful all the same. I have been feeling great, which makes me worried. I no longer have the headache that has been a constant since 5dp3dt. I no longer have an upset tummy and I certainly don't have sore tatas. Today I was busy cleaning the house (my cousin is coming to stay) and I didn't even need a nap after all of the scrubbing, mopping and vacuuming. I am not even peeing a lot! It makes me wonder what is going on inside of me. I know if I have the pleasure of morning sickness I will wish it all back but for now it would be comforting. Yesterday I poas and I freaked out! At first there was only one line and it was such a shock because even at 9dp3dt the two lines came up immediately. So I waited for 3 minutes and then I saw a very faint, and I mean faint, second line. This obviously still freaked me out but then I realized the faint line was the control line (I called the 1800 number to make sure). Actually hubby even peed on the stick to make sure the line that I had wasn't the control line (not a proud moment). So here I am waiting for an ultra sound and my body is giving me no indication that anything is going on inside of me. By the way a couple of days ago I had some very dark veins in my breasts and they seem to have disappeared. I hope I either imagined those lines or that it means nothing.
Anyways, on to my next, less neurotic, part of the post. I am just curious when people have told close friends and family they were pregnant. I know it is super early but I am very tempted to tell some very close people. I have told my sister (obviously because she is very invested) and my parents. I am just wondering when we tell people who are close to us but not immediate family. Hubby thinks Thursday would be appropriate, when we see the gestational sac (please god!!). I agree with him that I can't wait until we are 3 months (although that is what I know most people do) but is Thursday too early? Should we wait until we see a heart beat (please, please, let that happen)? Obviously I am not going to go announce it over facebook (now or ever) but what about our closest friends and extended family. Just curious when you girls told? My feeling is that if anything bad happens, it isn't going to make it any more or less difficult if we have told those closest to us. If anything it will make them understand what we are going through even more. They will literally have to visit me in the mental hospital if ANYTHING goes wrong, so why shouldn't I tell them. If it sounds like I am trying to convince you that now is as good as a time as any, it is because I am trying to convince myself it is okay to allow myself this pleasure. It will be the first time in my life I can say anything positive as far as our journey to conceive I just want to make the announcement too early.

Ultra Sound Scheduled

Just talked to my clinic and our first ultra sound is this week. Wow, that is super early!!! I go in on Thursday and I will only be 5w 1d, and I am worried we won't see anything. The nurse said it is the earliest that she does the ultra sounds but she knows I have been anxious and because my hcg is so high I am likely to see something. Obviously not a heart beat which will be the ultimate (please god let that happen) but maybe the sac. I am scared sh**less but I guess everyone is for their first ultra sound. It will make everything real because up until now I can't believe that this could be happening. One more time I am going to ask you to please pray for us!

Another High Beta!!!

My clinic just called and it was great news! My Beta today 14dp3dt is over 3,000. I know it is super high but I am not going to worry about it. The fact is, that I am pregnant. The nurse reassured me that it is okay and reminded me that although it is much higher than some people, because things double so quickly it isn't really that big. I am choosing to believe her and just going with it. I am as always "caustiously optomistic". The next step is the ultra sound and that is when I will actually believe I am truly pregnant. If I see a heart beat that day it will all be real. So now I am back to a 2ww. Who knew there was a 2ww after the 2ww!