Saturday, May 14, 2011

Egg Donor

My sister and I met with Dr. G on Thursday and it did not go well. He basically said she isn't a viable donor. We have scheduled another day 3 check up in hopes that her stats with be better but he was very negative about using her as a donor. This might sound crazy but we are still planning to go through with the process even if he thinks it is a waste of time. I know I sound thick headed but I just don't see the harm in trying. In my head although she isn't the best donor, she is my sister and she has had 3 kids. Plus she has drug coverage up to 5000 for fertility drugs so we won't be out of pocket at all. The plan is she will go through the stim process and if she has atleast 4 eggs then we will proceed to transfer. Otherwise we will call it a day and then figure out our next step. The next step is still to be determined but I have a feeling it will be moving on to an unknown egg donor. I know some of you have had experience with egg donors and I am curious about the cost and the process. Did you get the eggs through your clinic? If I live in Canada (where it is illegal to buy eggs) did you have to do FET or are there Canadian donors? I looked on a couple of websites and it looks as though you can get a local donor as long as the egg donor agency is run from the United States.
By the way I still don't really like Dr. G. He seems clueless and resents that I question him. Actually to be honest I am a bit overbearing in my appointments (according to my hubby and sister). What they don't understand is that he says a lot of shit that contradicts what he has said previously. Plus they don't even know what he is talking about in the appointments because they don't understand the process and the terms, they are like deer in headlights so they can't really judge. I honestly believe that Dr. G assumes that I haven't done any research and he says what he thinks I want to hear so he can make the appointment quick. For example he started our appointment off on Thursday saying everyhing looks great and we are good to go. When I inquired about my sisters extremely High E2 level he said he was more concerned about her low antral follicle count (well then how does everything "look great"). Then he said that he was happy with her FSH level. I said that I had read that a low FSH level didn't mean anything if E2 is high and follicle counts are low and he said "yes, that's what I was just telling you". Then he told my sister that her stats don't mean that she isn't fertile and that she can go on to have children (uh no kidding she has 3) they just mean that she isn't a good candidate to become an egg donor. I pointed out that she has kids and he said "yes, I know". Then he said (in an annoyed voice) that he was telling her so that she didn't go off the pill. This would make sense but she has her tubes tied. I couldn't resist pointing this out and he said "I know" again. Well if he knows already then what's the point in telling us this. He went on to tell us that we probably both have some genetic disorder that causes us to have premature ovarian failure early and that I would probably have a problem having kids even if I didn't have endometriosis. More Great News!!!! My sister was in a state of shock and started crying. She said she felt like a dud and she was so defeated by the appointment. At this point I took over and ignored the fact the Dr. G was determined for us to skip over my sister and move on to egg donation. Please don't get me wrong I know that our odds of getting preggo are better with an unknown donor but this is my sister and we have clearly stated that we want to explore this route first. I asked my sister if she was still interested in going through the stimming process even if she might only produce a few eggs and she said yes. I told Dr. G that we wanted to proceed regardless of her stats and he seemed to back down a little bit.
As it stands now my sister will start stimming June 21 and we will know if she is responding well by June 30 with a possible transfer date July 9. I know that I should be realistic but I am excited to move forward and get some answers.
Just wondering if anyone has had really high estrogen (E2) levels and if there is anything we can do to lower it? I also wondered if she should go on the birth control pill until she starts the long protocol?

11 comments:

  1. So sorry to hear about this obviously very annoying doctor. Any chance you can have a consultation with another one. Life is usually so much easier when you are working with people who you like, and who know what they are talking about.

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  2. Wow, honestly, your RE sounds like he is not paying attention to your case at all! She has to stay on BCPs when she already has her tubes tied, what the heck!

    Yes, high E2 can artificially suppress FSH. He should be devising a protocol for her more appropriate for high FSH, such as minimal suppression antagonist. He is going to put her on the long lupron protocol? Honestly that's the worst one he could pick. I think you should challenge him on that (good for you with speaking up, BTW!)

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  3. JNS I don't know how to contact you regarding the protocol! If you have an email address for me to send you a message that would be amazing!!

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  4. Good luck. Remember that doctors call it "practice" for a reason! ;)

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  5. That really sucks I truely hope it works out with your sister.

    For us it cost $27,000 Canadian for a local fresh donor, thats after our tax refund of $3300. The only thing we didn't claim was the agency fee from the USA. Thats lawyer, agency fee, donor out of pocket expenses, medical fees including 1 year storage of leftover embryos, medication (mine and donors) and travel fees (we live 5 hours from clinic).

    I'm not going to lie and say that its not hard to fork over that kind of money (or wager your house with the bank like we did) and not know if you in the good or bad part of the odds. But for us even with a quite a few years of paying this all back, we can't be happier with the agency we chose or the clinic we went to because of the results we've had. I'm 16 weeks preg with twins and have 12 leftover embryos if we want to have more little ones.

    I know we are one of the lucky ones that the DE ivf worked on the first try but I feel that with all of the positive support from the clinic and doctors we would not be where we are now.

    All the best and email me if you have any questions.

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  6. great job advocating for yourself. sounds like a difficult situation to be heard in, so keep standing up for yourself.

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  7. Sure! I'd prefer to email you first--any way to contact you?

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  9. Thanks JNS, you can email me anytime at stepoffgirl@hotmail.com

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  10. I'm proud of you for standing up for yourself to this doctor - not loving him, by the way... And I fully support your decision to try your sister's eggs. Why not? You have very little to lose.

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  11. I'm extremely pleased of you for status up for yourself to this physician - not nurturing him, by the way... And I completely assistance your choice to try your sister's egg. Why not? You have very little to get rid of.

    Best Fertility clinics

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