Look alike?

So I know it goes without saying that I love my boys more than anything and I wouldn't change anything about them for the world. Okay, there are moments when I wish they were less adventurous and "spirited" but at the end of the day I love them for being themselves.
However, if I am being 100% honest with myself I have to admit that sometimes (like once or twice since they were born) I wonder what a baby born using my eggs and my husband's sperm would look like. I know this might sound ungrateful or senseless to some but I have to be honest. It's not that I want anything different than what I have with my boys. I could not love them anymore and I am 100% happy with how things turned out. My boys were meant to be my boys and if we hadn't gone through the egg donor process with my sister they wouldn't be here. I am forever grateful to her and I wouldn't change anything. It is just what I consider a nutural curiousity. I have a feeling people who adopt continue to wonder the same thing.
Anyways the reason I write this is because my sister is helping my mom put all of her photographs on her computer and she sent a picture of me at 6 months. I immediately started to cry (like full on weep)  The first thing I saw in that picture was my son Hudson. I know this is silly and it shouldn't matter but I do see myself in him. People always tell me he looks like me but I shake it off. I think to myself "that's what everyone tells the mother". However today when I saw it too it brought me to tears. Okay, please don't think I am a narsassist or something. It doesn't mean I love him more or less. Fynn looks nothing like anyone in our family and I could never love him any more than I do. It just made me emotional because I thought to myself, maybe this is what my "egg children" would look like anyways.
Don't get me wrong I wouldn't have cared if my kids were a different race it was just a curiousity. I think a child takes on their parent's expressions, and traits and ends up looking like them regardless of how they came to them. We have family friends who adopted and at times in my life I thought they must have been mistaken because their children looked soooo much like them.
Anyways here is a picture, you might not see it but I sure do. Maybe it is just the eyebrows....lol

                                                                   Me at 6 months

 

Hudson at 3 months

Hudson and I last summer. Man I look tired (that was a very LONG week at my in-laws cottage without my husband). . Being a stay at home mom has caused me to be a fatty I know this because that sweatshirt no longer fits me at all :(

 

14 Months

You boys are so busy it is amazing to watch you go. You really get around quickly and get into EVERYTHING. That has been the case for months but it still amazes me what you find and how quickly you find it. I am realizing that you aren't my babies anymore as you toddle around the house. You are more sturdy on your feet now but you still have your accidents. Hudson this month you seemed to have a permenant bruise on your forehead from one spill or another.
Hudson
Well you personality has changed a bit this month. You are still my happy smiley guy but you also have other sides to you. You like to follow your brother around and take interest in the toys he is playing with. You seem to have a stronger grip on things and often manage to "acquire" whatever it is he is playing with, much to his dismay. Then you throw an absolute fit if I give it back to him. Thank goodness we have two of almost everything!  You love being outside (thank goodness the weather is finally getting warmer)and you love playing on the front porch.  You seem to stay close to mommy when we are out in public although you love being around other kids. You make sure to check in with me regularly making sureI am not too far from you. Another thing I have noticed is you are a little hesitant about walking on sand at the park but don't worry you'll get used to it. You do like tasting the sand however......lol. Another thing that really cracks me up, although it is quite bizarre, is you digging in the couch cushins for crumbs and then eating them. You are keeping mommy on top of the vacuuming otherwise who knows what you would find in there. It cracks me up because I just imagine you going to visits a friend's house and bee lining it to their couch for a snack......yuck. I don't know why I find this so funny, it is just so random. You are really working on your talking this month and you are starting to say more "words". For now the only words I recognize as words are "Mama, Dada, Dat (that), Dis (this), Ba (Ball), Baba (Bottle), P (up), Yum.
Fynn
Man you are fast, and always moving, you literally run around the house all of your waking hours. You are an all or nothing kind of guy. You are either yelping with happiness or melting down with frustration. You want to be able to do what you want when you want. You laugh so hard when you are happy and squel with delight. You also whine a lot and patient is not a word I would use to describe you. You love sitting in my lap and are just taking a real interest in books (thank goodness because mommy has been dying for this to happen). You guys have been in a great sleep pattern for 6 months now but I think things are shifting slightly. We used to just place you in your crib after our standard 100 bounces on the yoga ball but suddenly you are fighting your sleep a little bit. I have a feeling you might be transitioning down to one nap a day but mommy isn't ready for that. You crack me up buddy because you are so wild. For the last couple of days we have been waiting out front for daddy to welcome him home from work and it is like rangling a wild animal. You have NO fear and want to check out everything. The other day we were in the park and you saw a dog. You haven't had much exposure to animals so I was very curious to see how you would react. You loved him, and went right up and patted him on the head and looked right into his eyes. I am glad you were comfortable but also wondered if this was a natural reaction. You got 4 new teeth this month and we sure did notice it more than in previous months. You guys are still very good eaters and basically eat whatever you are given (meats, vegetables, fish, fruit and dairy).  You did seem to have a bit of a reaction to peanut butter (a rash) and because of grandpas allergy we will probably avoid it until we see the doctor next month.  Mommy still gives you some formula but you have transitioned well to milk. You aren't quite as interested in talking but you are making lots of sounds and have a few words "Mama, Dada, baba (bottle), Ba (Ball)". I think your new found interest in books will help us catch up on the word thing this month.

I love you my boys and it is so neat to watch you grow and to see your personalities emerge.




Excuse the pictures, I can't find my battery charger so these are from my phone. Plus the boys don't stay still so aren't the easiest subjects

Fynn playing at the Science Centre

                                                Hudson wishing everyone a Happy Easter 

                                            Fynn not in the mood to wish everyone a Happy Easter!

                                  
                                       Fynn found the snacks when mommy was putting Hudson down for his nap!

                                                     Hudson enjoy a rare sunny day!

                                    
                                        Another picture of Fynn with something in his mouth.

 

Lol, this is Hudson when he is very tired after a big trip to the zoo!

Oops a repeat I suck at technology!

Kourtney a Surrogate for Khloe (ugh!!!)

Just saw a clip from "Keeping up with the Kardashians" where Kourtney discusses the possibility of being a surrogate for Khloe, yep I read and watch those disgusting entertainment magazines. Anyways, I hate what I saw. Don't get me wrong I think it would be awesome if that's what Khloe wants. I just hate that the conversation took place and in my opinion exploited Khloe. She didn't ever mention wanting a surrogate (I know this is a scripted show don't worry) and I hate that others are discussing her options. Maybe I am being hypocritical because I am sure my sister had a conversation with her husband before offering her eggs to me (actually I am not sure of that because my sister usually makes her own decisions, but she probably told him that she was going to offer). I also think that Scott's reaction was disgusting, basically saying it was disturbing and kind of gross (those weren't his words but his sentiment).  Basically he acted really childish and not very empathetic to Khloe. Don't get me wrong surrogacy isn't for everyone but it isn't a joke and it shouldn't be thought of as weird. What I do remember him saying was "so your going to have a baby and then give them your baby", ugh are people so ignorant. He then said the classic, why don't they just adopt a child that needs a family (why does he get to have an opinion on how she decides to build HER family).
For some reason this makes me sooooooo mad!

Having a twin is the best!

The boys have so much fun playing together now and it is hilarious to watch them. There favourite time of day to play is right before bedtime and I took this video to capture the moment.

On the move (Part 2)

Well the boys are officially walking. Hudson has been taking multiple steps for a little while but out of nowhere Fynn decided he was ready too. He has been stepping on his tippy toes from the beginning and doesn't have great balance so we really didn't see it coming. He is fearless and wants to walk all of the time, he has lots of bumps and bruises to show for her new skill.

Should strollers be allowed in doctor's offices?

Just curious what your opinions are. I am on a facebook forum for moms of multiples and one mother was not permitted to use her stroller in the office. She has 2 eight month olds that don't sit up on their own so she chose to leave when the doctor wouldn't make an exception.  My feelings are mixed, on one hand I know how difficult it is to juggle two kids with no stroller in public but on the other hand I know how cramped and dirty offices can become with multiple strollers. What is your opinion?

The BIG one!!!!

The boys are offically one and I still don't believe it. Holy cow that was a fast year but at the same time I can't believe life existed without them. We have had an incredible year filled with lots of emotions, ups and downs and tons of love and fun.
I failed a bit as a mom for their birthdays because I had a lot of plans that didn't happen but hey it was a great day and there is always next year. The thing is we have a tiny (I mean really small) house and we could never fit more than another family in here comfortably. So instead of hosting the party here we had it at Pizza Hut (I know glamorous....lol). We had less than 20 people (us and babies included) but it was the perfect size and the boys did really well. Fynn had one minor meltdown but that is to be expected, he has never really liked loud noises and lots of people and this was both. Hudson loved every second of it and probably would have partied all night....lol.
I had ordered the boys custom made birthday shirts from Etsy but they did not arrive in time (you would think 3 weeks would be sufficient). I ended up getting them little bow ties from Gap and they looked adorable. I had planned to make the boys their first cake, I had literally planned it in my head for an entire year. HOWEVER, I have NEVER made a cake and apparently it is harder than it looks. Okay, I am a disaster in the kitchen. Luckily I had done a couple of trail runs for hubbys birthday and came to the quick conclusion that this year I would purchase a cake. It was delicious and it all worked out. I guess we will just have to do a home photo shoot with a cake smash when the shirts finally arrive.

Birthday Breakfast at home

First Birthday Cake the only thing I would have changed was I would have also ordered two smaller cakes/cupcakes for the boys with the messy icing to get the standard icing on the face first birthday picture.

Hudson with his new mega bloks table

 The boys enjoying their new gift (sorry about the mess our house is tiny and we are overflowing). Good news is we bought a new house and move at the end of April!!!

 Pizza Hut, decorated by daddy!

 Cute Hudson ready to open a gift (with help from cousins)

 Fynn a bit overwhelmed by everything

 Daddy and his boys

 My neice Ruby and I

Mommy and Huddy (I hate this pic of me but I am with one of my boys so I still love it)

Poor Fynn is done, the hat put him over the top :(

Yep, we like cake! FYI Hudson was trying to drink soda.........ah!!!! Every chance he had he would steal those like plastic cups and put the straw in his mouth, he sure is quick. Luckily he didn't really know how to use a big boy straw.